If you want to know anything about influence, first read Aesop's The North Wind and The Sun. A story where the wind and the sun have a bet on who can get the cape off a horse-riding traveller first.
The wind blows and blows and the traveller clings on to his cape more and more. Defeated, the wind gives up and the sun has a go. The sun simply shines. The traveller, enjoying the sun's glow, dismounts and removes his cape of his own accord.
This story holds one of the most important secrets of human interaction.
The wind establishes no relationship, no rapport and simply tries to hussle the rider. The rider will do almost anything to resist the wind's forces.
The sun gives the traveller something that he wants. He provides the circumstances that the customer needs in order to make a decision himself.
In order to influence people you need to establish the following. Without these you will never be able to sell, lead or truly influence anything in your life.
Rapport. This broadly means being at one with somebody. There are many ways to do this and it is a simply huge subject - sign up to my free emails to find out more. A quick guide might be to mirror somebody's posturing, body language and the speeds at which they speak, operate and even breathe! Sounds strange? You probably do it with many people already without even recognising it. Try to be more consciously aware of it.
Listen. Seek first to understand then to be understood, as Stephen Covey puts it in his seminal work, The Seven Habits of Highly Effective People. Listen, question, and listen again. Whilst doing this, program yourself not to prejudge what is being said or to start thinking about what you will say next. Really listen and understand.
Give. If you give a little, you get so much more back. That goes for giving a free trial of your product or just giving stuff away. Studies have proven that people are much more likely to interact and do business with you if they are already in receipt of a 'gift' from you.
The 'gift' could even be words or feelings. If you offer advice, a shoulder to lean on or sometimes just a smile (this is far from twee, it is extremely effective), you are going to find people are easier to influence.
Confidence. People will follow you if you display confidence. Talk straight, stand up straight and you're already half way there!
Stories. Great salespeople and leaders are great story tellers. Not stories of the tall variety, though! Providing stories will hit the subconscious of your listener in powerful ways.
* It's interesting, so people stay switched on
* You can say almost anything you like to people as 'part of the story'
* Stories can answer objections by giving a testimonial
* They give you an apparent depth
The wind blows and blows and the traveller clings on to his cape more and more. Defeated, the wind gives up and the sun has a go. The sun simply shines. The traveller, enjoying the sun's glow, dismounts and removes his cape of his own accord.
This story holds one of the most important secrets of human interaction.
The wind establishes no relationship, no rapport and simply tries to hussle the rider. The rider will do almost anything to resist the wind's forces.
The sun gives the traveller something that he wants. He provides the circumstances that the customer needs in order to make a decision himself.
In order to influence people you need to establish the following. Without these you will never be able to sell, lead or truly influence anything in your life.
Rapport. This broadly means being at one with somebody. There are many ways to do this and it is a simply huge subject - sign up to my free emails to find out more. A quick guide might be to mirror somebody's posturing, body language and the speeds at which they speak, operate and even breathe! Sounds strange? You probably do it with many people already without even recognising it. Try to be more consciously aware of it.
Listen. Seek first to understand then to be understood, as Stephen Covey puts it in his seminal work, The Seven Habits of Highly Effective People. Listen, question, and listen again. Whilst doing this, program yourself not to prejudge what is being said or to start thinking about what you will say next. Really listen and understand.
Give. If you give a little, you get so much more back. That goes for giving a free trial of your product or just giving stuff away. Studies have proven that people are much more likely to interact and do business with you if they are already in receipt of a 'gift' from you.
The 'gift' could even be words or feelings. If you offer advice, a shoulder to lean on or sometimes just a smile (this is far from twee, it is extremely effective), you are going to find people are easier to influence.
Confidence. People will follow you if you display confidence. Talk straight, stand up straight and you're already half way there!
Stories. Great salespeople and leaders are great story tellers. Not stories of the tall variety, though! Providing stories will hit the subconscious of your listener in powerful ways.
* It's interesting, so people stay switched on
* You can say almost anything you like to people as 'part of the story'
* Stories can answer objections by giving a testimonial
* They give you an apparent depth
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Subscribe to Email Updates
Get More From Jon
Selling
First Impressions
Contractual Sales
Closing
Influence
Top Tips
Objections
Marketing
The Amazing Difference
The Traps
The Power of Attraction
Advertising
Testing & Measuring
The Internet
Pay Per Click
Direct Mail
Public Relations (PR)
Telemarketing
Customer Service
Word of Mouth
Mindset
Who Are You?
What Do You Do?
Invest In Yourself
Wealth & Success
Your Friends & Family
Serendipity
NLP
Hints and Tips
Simplicity
The Key to Success
Potholes
Business Success Group
Further Resources
Contact Us
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